1 hour+ job interview and the emptiness in my guts

I think it may be a mistake to stop updating this blog.

I get annoyed because I know this blog can't never get famous. Then there is clp, I have to focus on my studies. Later on I may not see the point anymore.

This might act as a form of salvation for me.

Regardless not many people would understand what it means for me and what is the content of my posts.

Yesterday attended an interview at Aeon Headquaters Taman Cheras. To sum up things on the outside, the building is very old and the office doesn't seem all that glamorous and advanced.

I waited for more than 30 minutes before the interview. I spent 1 hour and 15 minutes to complete the interview, tedious process.

The questions are so widespread, it contains:
1.You introduce yourself.
2.What if you passed CLP, or vice versa.
3.Where do you see yourself in 3 years.
4.What is your plan of life.
5.How do you deal with stress.
6.How many siblings do you have in your family.
7.Your academic background for sure.
8.Ask you to explain short, precise, comprehensive and in depth of your clp syllabus.
9.Ask seriously in depth knowledge on land law and require application without time to think.
10.Give hypothetical scenario if get scolded by boss in the open office how to deal with it.
11.Hypothetical scenario if get scolded by customers.....
12.Inform on the job scope which is shockingly wide.
13.Inform of a dead 2 years employment contract or else amounted to breach of contract.

Job scope would include basically everything that can be legal,namely:
1.Any branches or outlet of Aeon in Malaysia could be your business.
2.From any shop having leakage of water to the company building a piece of land and building a mall on it until the mall is done.
3.Any promotional events can be your business.
4.Any employee complaining unlawful dismissal or unfair treatment could be your business.
5.Plenty of opportunity to deal with government and local authorities.
6.Required to outstation alone. Possibly Johor.
7.May required to attend to court case for the company whenever necessarily.
8.7 working days as cashier to help out within a year.
9.Have to go count stock twice a year that last for approximately 7 working days.
10.2+1 policy, any project that comes to your hand should be completed within 2 days including receive approval from your superior and delivery to the customer, extension for 1 day may be granted upon complexity of project.
11.Every word and clause in the contract has to be negotiate accordingly and keep written corresponding with acknowledgement from parties.
12.Even being cashier has to deal with the project in hand.
13.Working hours from 830 to 630 and if OT to 930.
14.Your project is your project and others if free is only meant to assist.

Then after the interview I went home, sleep deprived as I always got insomnia the night before some big thing.

Also my dad kind of contributed to my emptiness of feeling. I wonder will I still care if those criticisms were actually from someone other than family.

The content is just that I don't act girly and can't possibly find a guy to get laid. Very bad marriage prospect. It is as if such failure in life not being able to find a guy to sleep with him. I am sure it is easy to simply find a guy to sleep with, there are places with ready stock.

I just wonder what is the point. Unless I wanted that pleasure and there is a guy I am willing to sleep with, otherwise should any girl for the purpose of maintaining or gaining social recognizing of her status as a girl to get laid.

I wonder don't you have some self respect when saying all these things. By the way your daughter is most likely gay so I don't even think you know what that means.

To be honest those feelings are caused by more than him. I am mad at him for sure. So I am not talking to him from the night until when I am writing this post.

Other factors due to myself feeling weak, so much hesitation. Do I want this job?

Yes, because:
1.Plenty of unusual learning experiences.
2. Aeon is a big company so my resume would seem good.
3.You don't always get  a chance like this.
4.Their benefits are all right.

No, because:
1. 20 km 1 way to work and 20 km 1 way back home. Time, traffic,petrol.
2.Salary isn't all that high consider all the tasks.
3.2 years have to stay there.
4.If I passed clp it will delay substantially when I started chamber. I know I wanted to do criminal litigation if I passed clp.
5.Obviously I am afraid that my holidays would just end so fast.

When I think about it now, I am not good at filtering nonsense from the world into my life. I am afraid of what people would say, especially family members are starting to question my future plan, namely employment. I try to be safe on what if I failed clp, gonna need a job and debt is knocking my door.

If I knew that I failed my clp I think without much hesitation I would have jump for this job, a little bit of self destruction trying to torture myself I guess, like if CLP doesn't work how about try something unusual to top up yourself.

Now it feels more like forcing yourself. Anyway I learn valuable interview skill there I believe.

It is so good to be back again. Writing does help.

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