Compete for love

Everyone want happiness and love in their life.

I want to believe that there is some kind of love which is always there for you. We called it unconditional love.

It is that kind of love Christianity propose they are giving it. Your God Father always love you that he sent his only son to die in suffering for you.

Back on earth, today I feel slightly uneasy thus I need to update this post, for myself. If accidentally someone else is reading this and feel something, I wish it has some positive impact on you.

My mother has 3 children, I have 2 siblings. My brother is 21 years, while my sister is 20 years older than me. Technically we didn't grow up together. They watched me growing up.

Today is my mother's birthday. The night before I was thinking about buying her a cake and celebrate it with her. Then I recall she has this weird belief that if I mentioned it is her birthday expressly to her, it brings bad luck to her.

The next day my sister called and wish her Happy Birthday. My mum is really happy and she keeps on saying my sister has the virtue of filial piety.

The afternoon my brother whatapps me and I told him today is mum's birthday, given the past record he never remember this kind of stuff. At night he called from Sri Lanka and wish my mum Happy Birthday.

Again she is really happy.

I tell myself, you should be happy about it. Your mum won't be happy if it is just you who remember her birthday.

I could have distract myself and let the feelings pass.

Then I thought I should write about it. Even though I have no idea how this article will lead me to.

Some say romance or anything in this world end up in a war zone, you fight for it. The reason you have to fight for it is because plenty of competitors are out there wanting the same time just as you do.

There are times I feel bad because I thought I am the one who spend most of my time with my mother. I took up most of her emotional and irrational moments.

In a way I feel that I contribute more toward her well being etc, but I could never replace my other siblings, in term of authority and simply that I am not as good as them.

Not necessarily a bad thing, only until I feel bad about it. First, it can makes me feel like I am a bad person. I should not feel it that way, especially it is not some form of competition.

Even parents love for their children aren't equal.

It is silly for you to think that by doing more you are fighting to actually gaining anything as a result.

So, what is the point of this writing? I don't really know exactly.

Actions and expressions are what that counts. Thinking is simply overrated.

You think and you never write it out, no one else will ever find out.

That's not exactly the point but if I must give this writing a purpose, I would say I am here.

I am here, still breathing and I manage to type it out.

If none of us could have fight for someone love, it is what it's been given, would be it okay?

You cannot change anything, you just have to accept it and seek positive perspective from it. Is that true?

Maybe there is some magnetic force unseen by most of us that is managing it all.

Is that what we call it, Meant to be?


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